tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post3352442059425070126..comments2023-07-18T04:20:12.430-04:00Comments on making HAPPY happen: Marriage is real folksAmandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12558127185304131807noreply@blogger.comBlogger31125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-57725673042057696422012-09-28T00:19:05.887-04:002012-09-28T00:19:05.887-04:00i like this post.....so normal! i definitely thin...i like this post.....so normal! i definitely think things calm down the longer you are married, but then the frustrations are that much worse when they come. so true that you never realize just how frustrated you can feel at someone you love so much. plus the changing so much since we met thing.....yes it is nice to hear someone write these things out loud.meredithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06815638137141413114noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-15730810053062409062012-09-26T13:48:17.681-04:002012-09-26T13:48:17.681-04:00This comment makes me so happy. Don't ever be ...This comment makes me so happy. Don't ever be ashamed of going to counseling! I'd kill for counseling. It's just too expensive here in NY. But when we go back to UT (at least that's the plan as of now) we're making it a priority in our budget. I think EVERY couple should go to counseling! I hate that it's looked down on and people assume you are a dysfunctional couple or that you are on the verge of divorce, etc. I honestly believe you are a much more functional couple if you are both willing to go and work through things. Recognizing that you could use help is the first and most important step! How awesome of you guys! That's seriously so admirable. I'm so happy to hear that it helped! Makes me that much more excited to go and learn how we can communicate better! So glad to have discovered your blog now too! :) <br /><br />xoxo,<br />MandyDerek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-69697579717747354562012-09-26T13:41:08.358-04:002012-09-26T13:41:08.358-04:00Same story here. So grateful for change! Being wil...Same story here. So grateful for change! Being willing to change is so difficult, but it makes things so much better! Thanks for the tip!! Love it! Derek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-86404372020408390982012-09-26T13:36:35.371-04:002012-09-26T13:36:35.371-04:00Love it! And it's all so true. The wedding nig...Love it! And it's all so true. The wedding night, assuming we don't mean to hurt each other, etc. Love it all. You're wonderful!Derek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-840377791602900762012-09-25T20:22:23.774-04:002012-09-25T20:22:23.774-04:00I just stumbled upon your blog and I must say I lo...I just stumbled upon your blog and I must say I love this post. It is so beautifully written and filled with so much truth and wisdom! I must admit I am bothered at the way people speak of marriage being easy and wonderful (especially mormons). My husband and I are mormon. Everyone told us how easy marriage would be. Nothing could have prepared me (or him probably) for the hardships that would come. Our first year together was such a challenge - I am embarrassed to admit how much we fought. In fact, we did marriage counseling for half of our first year together (is that sad or what?). How we ever made it out of our first year hand in hand and still in love I'm not quite sure; but what I do know is that we have grown and changed in so many ways and I feel like our relationship is unbreakable now. That is not to say we don't have trials or arguments anymore, because ha, we do. Believe me we do. We just know how to handle them so much better. We are a team and at the end of every day, regardless of how upset we might've been with the other that day, we are best friends. Thanks for being so real and honest. It's refreshing and makes me feel better because sometimes I feel like we are the only young married couple that don't live in perfect marital bliss. Kristenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07670847354432943893noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-80863570473072707952012-09-23T10:07:56.642-04:002012-09-23T10:07:56.642-04:00I love that you talked about changing. I can't...I love that you talked about changing. I can't tell you how much I've changed after almost 3 years of being married. If I was the same person today as when we were first married, my hub would probably say "see ya!" It's so important to be aware of the weaknesses you bring to the table and find a way to improve. LOVE this post Amanda! You're awesome :)Amanda Petersennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-74055644726816188902012-09-22T08:33:29.250-04:002012-09-22T08:33:29.250-04:00Lame. My mom is visiting and she was signed into ...Lame. My mom is visiting and she was signed into her google account instead of me onto mine. So Nancy Hopkin is really Rachael....Hohmann Familyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17489957615683056126noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-30762376247476052342012-09-22T08:30:19.443-04:002012-09-22T08:30:19.443-04:00Before I was married my Dad used to say, "Jus...Before I was married my Dad used to say, "Just have a sense of humor and you will be fine." He was referring to the wedding night in particular, but I feel like it relates to the rest of it too. I also feel like there is a constant need to forgive. So many times we don't mean to hurt each other. We have to assume that our spouse didn't mean to be mean. Then things usually work out better. Hope your marriage continues to have it's beautiful ups and the difficult downs - 'cause that's how we grow together and become better!Nancy Hopkinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06232283862132798283noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-30905727054268768932012-09-21T23:32:01.678-04:002012-09-21T23:32:01.678-04:00Pai, you're so sweet, as always. I am so grate...Pai, you're so sweet, as always. I am so grateful this post had an influence on people. I feel that the feedback I've received has helped me more than you will know. Your support is so great. Sure love you! xo.Derek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-12336345686904993272012-09-21T23:29:55.750-04:002012-09-21T23:29:55.750-04:00Well you are so so nice. Seriously, that means a l...Well you are so so nice. Seriously, that means a lot coming from an incredible writer!Derek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-74199604231358621712012-09-21T23:29:10.398-04:002012-09-21T23:29:10.398-04:00Love that. Such good advice!Love that. Such good advice!Derek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-52836103845420167962012-09-21T23:28:46.251-04:002012-09-21T23:28:46.251-04:00Thanks Chloe! That means a lot. I try so hard to b...Thanks Chloe! That means a lot. I try so hard to be honest, even though it's scary sometimes. I appreciate others honesty so much, and want to be able to give to others what I have gained from others honesty. Derek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-26527209778055138992012-09-21T23:21:40.772-04:002012-09-21T23:21:40.772-04:00Haha I love this. It made me so happy to hear this...Haha I love this. It made me so happy to hear this. Not that you feel that way too, just to know that I'm not just crazy. Ha! It sucks huh?! I miss you! xoxoDerek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-5918304367028173702012-09-21T23:14:10.528-04:002012-09-21T23:14:10.528-04:00Love that. 100/100. It's so true. If you are g...Love that. 100/100. It's so true. If you are giving 50/50, you are always trying to make things equal and fair which isn't healthy to a marriage. You are such a good wife and mom. I look up to you! Thanks so much for your feedback!Derek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-67348296204787731382012-09-21T23:09:32.731-04:002012-09-21T23:09:32.731-04:00So glad this didn't scare you more! Haha. Marr...So glad this didn't scare you more! Haha. Marriage is not scary. :) I really am so glad this helped you to understand a bit and helped to calm your fears. JUST what I was hoping for! Derek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-80827858525315128582012-09-21T22:59:54.364-04:002012-09-21T22:59:54.364-04:00TRUETRUEDerek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-8101832699001830302012-09-21T22:59:37.492-04:002012-09-21T22:59:37.492-04:00So happy this helped. I wish someone would have to...So happy this helped. I wish someone would have told me years ago so I didn't think we had serious problems this whole time. I think recognizing it's normal helps so much. It inspires me to try harder and make it through the hard times. You guys are so cute btw. Congrats on your wedding! You were a stunning bride!Derek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-39503486882641430552012-09-21T22:57:02.450-04:002012-09-21T22:57:02.450-04:00Gosh, I feel ya. I kept feeling like something was...Gosh, I feel ya. I kept feeling like something was wrong with us and that we had serious marital issues. But I started to realize we were more normal than I thought. The feedback from this blog post was my biggest realization of all though. I'm so grateful for the comments I've received to make me really believe that everyone feels this way! So glad you read my blog. I quite adore yours as well. xoxoDerek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-74513050476097443442012-09-21T22:54:27.289-04:002012-09-21T22:54:27.289-04:00Long distance is SO hard. I hate it. There is so m...Long distance is SO hard. I hate it. There is so much drama it seems like that is unnecessary and that could be avoided if you were closer. We were long distance, and I'm so glad that's over. Being married will be a relief. Hard, but a relief. :) So great hearing from you! I sure miss you!Derek and Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09851799881035644631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-21271525470310825782012-09-21T16:42:00.197-04:002012-09-21T16:42:00.197-04:00Manda. You are a beautiful writer. I seriously am ...Manda. You are a beautiful writer. I seriously am so impressed by how you just put all of what I've felt (plus so much more) into words that I've never compiled. I love it because there seriously are so many pressures to just fit into the "perfect" mold of the "perfect" marriage. But nobody fits that and everybody has their struggles. Boy I know we do! Thanks for being so great and wonderful and real and respectable and beautiful (inside and out) and open to helping other people through your blog. Love you girl. Paigehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05439065889319527766noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-58195296789022554312012-09-20T21:20:17.502-04:002012-09-20T21:20:17.502-04:00Oooh I love this so much. So so much. You are so...Oooh I love this so much. So so much. You are so good. So so good.Sarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05500755813814305266noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-82253529113839169032012-09-20T12:26:18.543-04:002012-09-20T12:26:18.543-04:00That's my girl! Love how you see things. One ...That's my girl! Love how you see things. One of my greatest marriage tricks (after 25 years!) that I have recently developed is to decide beforehand how big of a deal something is to ever even have to bring it up and 'work it out'. If I change the subject in my mind and think of something else, a lot of times, within an hour, I can't even remember what I was so bent on fixing! Wish I would have figured this one out 20 years ago!Barry and Julie Hallsted Familyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15095918352803653356noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-32925358611362613852012-09-20T01:52:00.379-04:002012-09-20T01:52:00.379-04:00I love this, Mands! Everyone needs to read this!I love this, Mands! Everyone needs to read this!MulfHerdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05432349247040519998noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-80660776247425302852012-09-19T16:59:11.201-04:002012-09-19T16:59:11.201-04:00Thanks for this post Amanda. I love your honesty! ...Thanks for this post Amanda. I love your honesty! So many blogs are so fake and pretend that their lives are perfect. I'm glad that you aren't one of those blogs. You make everything so real and put things into perspective! Chloehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02848543373419116433noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4908720895171499067.post-7898425185562762062012-09-19T11:37:07.372-04:002012-09-19T11:37:07.372-04:00Perfectly said! I had to giggle at the " A lo...Perfectly said! I had to giggle at the " A lot of people say go to sleep and work it out in the morning, but then the problem is that I can't sleep. Derek can sleep just fine, but I'll stay up all night sad and frustrated." part-- that is totally Landon & I.. he falls asleep and I'm up alllll night! Miss you girl! xoAdriana Jaussinoreply@blogger.com